She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
This is my life. Enjoy the view
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Randomize
