i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Randomize
