so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
My balls are so social today.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
