i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
Walk of Shame today included voting.
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
Randomize
