butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
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