I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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