We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
