she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
Randomize
