she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
