dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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