Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
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