NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Randomize
