WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
