we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
Randomize
