I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
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