i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
Randomize
