ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize
