Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
Randomize
