Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
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