I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
