"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
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