I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Randomize
