i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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