Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
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