no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
Randomize
