Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
True strength comes from lack of pants
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Randomize