So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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