i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
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