all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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