Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
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