I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
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