Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
The cops high fived after they tackled you
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
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