you have to choose: penises or morals?
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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