Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
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