mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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