Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
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