Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
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