Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
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