isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
