Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
