You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
I should be sponsored by Trojan
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
We had to coat check the pizza.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
Randomize
