Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
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