Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
Randomize
