Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
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