And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
Randomize
