and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
