I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
You don't make any sense
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