just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
