I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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