420 ftw
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Randomize
